Family relationships can be a delicate balance of love, expectations, and complex dynamics, particularly between siblings. These stories explore the challenges that arise when expectations clash, whether it’s dealing with perceived favoritism, differing levels of support, or navigating the shifting dynamics of adulthood.
Sibling’s jealousy over achievements
This has been an ongoing issue and I need some outside opinions with my oldest daughter. My oldest daughter is working as a waitress ever since she dropped out of college. She wasn’t going to classes and she GPA plummeted. The university kicked her out.
Due to this she doesn’t have much money to do anything. My other daughter is graduating and just got a job offer to a good company. I will call the oldest Madison and the younger, Becky. Fake names.
Becky is going to make good money starting her job and doesn’t have any loans ( she got a full ride to her college). Madison is in debt and strugggling and this is where the help is issues stem from.
She believes she should be going better than Becky since she is older. I have tried over and over to help her but she has turned bitter about anything that Becky achieves
Becky told us she planned on going to Iceland in the fall. It was a quick conversation but in the car ride home Madison went off. She was pissed that she gets to do all this cool stuff and that it wasn’t fair. She started to insult Becky and that is when I had enough.
I told her she needs to get over jelepusly and the reason her life is the way it is is her own fault. We got into an argument and she is pissed. My wife thinks I went too far but I think she need to hear it
🔥 Top User Reactions
YTA – This just isn’t great parenting. She is where she is, I get it. The message she needs is, “You guys are where you are because of the decisions you’ve made. Now, what decisions are you going to make going forward? Will you work towards getting your degree again? Will you learn a new skill? Life keeps going, let’s make a plan.” >I told her she needs to get over jelepusly and the reason her life is the way it is is her own fault. This is true and surely feels good to say but it’s not good coaching. She knows how she dug this hole. She needs to know how to get out.
Depends how you delivered it and whether you were just being mean, punching down on a kid whose childhood and life experience was significantly different than her sister’s, whether you regulate your emotions well, etc. You are describing a larger situation while asking about a single incident. That always makes me suspicious that you might have been the asshole, now trying to defend being an asshole.
ESH. She still has time. You seem to be both nurturing the feeling she has that she isn’t good enough, and then criticise her for having that insecurity. She will never move past this if she feels so low about herself. You cannot chastise someone into doing better like this. She shouldn’t have said what she said, so it’s ESH, and I do think you were right to push back. But it’s very clear she is a disappointment to you.
>I told her she needs to get over jelepusly and the reason her life is the way it is is her own fault. We got into an argument and she is pissed. My wife thinks I went too far but I think she need to hear it Whether you went too far or not depends more on *how* you said this than what you had to say. We randos on the Internet weren’t in the car to hear your tone of voice or the words you used. Maybe she needed to hear some harsh truths, but maybe also she needed them delivered in a different way if there was any hope of her actually listening to them. Marking this INFO, possibly ESH. I would trust the judgement of your wife who was there and knows both of you over people on the Internet who, frankly, love to see someone torn down for the drama and don’t really care if it helps them get on the right path or not.
Fairness in grandchild experiences
I have two grandchildren from my daughter, a granddaughter who is six years old and a grandson soon to be four. I’ve taken my granddaughter to Disneyland many times, just the two of us, creating cherished memories. However, due to various circumstances, I haven’t had the chance to take my grandson yet.
In two months, we have a planned family trip to Disneyland with my daughter and both grandkids. Nonetheless, I decided to take my grandson this week, just the two of us, to give him the same undivided attention and special experience his sister had during her first visit.
This decision, however, has upset my daughter, who feels it’s unfair to take only one grandchild. Despite her concerns, I firmly believe that my grandson deserves the full focus and attention during his inaugural Disneyland trip, just as his sister did.
Ensuring both grandchildren have the opportunity to create cherished memories and experience the magic of Disneyland is my priority. While I understand my daughter’s perspective, I stand by my decision to provide my grandson with the same one-on-one experience, allowing him to fully immerse himself in the wonder of his first visit.
🔥 Top User Reactions
Here’s the thing: your granddaughter got ‘alone’ trips because she was born first, but her brother will likely have events later in his teen life that she won’t get because she’s older and will move out/go to college.
it’s not your decision, it’s not your kid, you dont just get to take them from their home whenever you want
YTA for one reason. You are taking your daughter’s joy of taking his kid there for the first time. Take him alone after his first time there and then explain your granddaughter that its his time to go alone just like she did.
YTA You don’t get to “just decide” anything for someone else’s child. You are not a decision maker in those children’s lives.
If you’re paying. Who cares what the daughter says. Your way or no way. Life is unfair. We all have favorite kids and grandchildren. Some kids are just miserable to be around. That’s ok. It’s life.
Mother’s social media boundaries
The story revolves around a toxic and draining on-and-off relationship that lasted for about a year, from 2023 to 2024. It was characterized by constant arguments, name-calling, and all sorts of negative behaviors. Finally, the narrator broke it off early in 2025.
After the breakup, the ex-partner became obsessive, making numerous calls from unknown numbers, sending requests on various social media platforms, and even attempting to gather information through a friend’s failed pursuit of a relationship with the narrator. The situation escalated to the point where the ex-partner’s family members were also involved in contacting the narrator.
Surprisingly, the narrator’s mother began following the ex-partner on Instagram about six months into the relationship, and even after a year had passed since the breakup, she continued to do so and occasionally texted him. Despite the narrator’s repeated requests for her to unfollow the ex-partner due to the harassment and hurt caused, the mother dismissed the concerns, leading to heated arguments.
The mother justified her actions by claiming that the narrator follows people they don’t like, which the narrator vehemently denied, stating that they only interact with close friends on social media and block or unfollow anyone they don’t care for. The narrator found it strange and concerning that the mother defended following someone who had been awful to them.
The narrator is now left wondering what steps to take next, as the mother’s behavior and refusal to acknowledge the harm caused by the ex-partner’s actions have created a tense and difficult situation.
🔥 Top User Reactions
NTA. Has your Mom shown other signs of being a selfish narcissist throughout your life, and you just don’t know what a healthy Mother/Daughter relationship is like? Or is this unusual for her. My parents would NEVER do this or try to justify it.
I would remove her from your media pages. Go low contact with her and tell her nothing about your life. She is violating your trust. Don’t give up on her but her behaviour is toxic and you should avoid giving her information to pass along.
NTA. If you asked nicely and offered your POV regarding why this bothers you, someone close to you would respect that. The simple fact that you asked should be enough for them to understand that it’s something important to you. Just out of curiosity – did they really get along before things ended? Just wondering why this is such a “difficult ask” for her. Regardless, I still feel parents should be on your side no matter what.
The following thing isn’t the weird part to me. The texting is.
Your mom has a thing for your ex
