In a world where personal autonomy is cherished, setting boundaries can be a delicate dance between asserting one’s needs and respecting those of others. Whether it’s defining physical or emotional space, drawing lines in the sand, or managing external expectations, individuals find themselves grappling with the complexities of self-preservation and maintaining harmonious relationships.
Neighbor’s Smoking Sovereignty
I own a single family home. No HOA. Neighbors probably 50 feet away or so that moved in about a year ago. I was smoking a joint on my porch (screened in, tinted) and hear my neighbor yelling to her husband about how ridiculous it is. Saying she was going to confront me and “do something about it” with her college aged daughter egging her on to do so.
I try to be mindful of when my neighbors are outside (although they always seem to be lol) and aim to smoke when I don’t see them outside or when it’s windy/rainy. Every once in a while (not every day) during the day I will take a quick bong hit or two.
I can’t help but feel like she’s making assumptions bc of my age (20s). I am disabled and try to go for the higher terps, so I know it reeks.
AITA if I continue smoking on my property as normal?
Edit: I work full time (not pulling disability and laying around smoking all day like some of these comments think), my house is kept clean, lawn taken care of, dogs are quiet, no parties, in bed by 10 pm.
I was pretty thrown off by the situation because I’ve helped this neighbor multiple times on my own accord and they aren’t exactly “perfect” neighbors either. Their dogs bark all day long (outside most of the day). I’ve come back from work to her on my property multiple times (no trespassing signs) looking for her loose dog. I’ve even gone over to personally let her know that her dog is loose (she didn’t know) and I will help catch her. Their kid has loud parties in the summer time. I never cause a fuss and mind my own business. We haven’t had any issues since they’ve moved in until this point. Smoking habits stayed the same.
Btw, legal state since so many asked, but I have a medical card.
Unpaid Travel Tax
A couple, both aged 28, found themselves in an awkward situation with their friend, also 28 years old. Whenever the friend visited their place for an overnight stay, she insisted on them paying two-thirds of her travel expenses, be it petrol or train fare.
Initially, the couple agreed to this arrangement, but over time, they started feeling uncomfortable about being ‘billed’ every time their friend came over. The amounts ranged from £10 to £40 per person, which they considered unreasonable, given that the friend didn’t contribute to any other expenses during her stay.
Despite the couple’s efforts to put an end to this practice, their friend persistently argued that it was a normal and fair expectation for them to cover a portion of her travel costs. The discussions on this matter had been ongoing for over a year, causing friction in their friendship.
While the couple acknowledged earning more than their friend, they didn’t feel obligated to subsidize her visits, especially considering that her parents provided her with financial support. Moreover, the friend’s primary reason for visiting them stemmed from her recent move from her parents’ house to her own flat, and the couple had already made plans to reciprocate the visit.
Caught in this dilemma, the couple found themselves questioning whether their stance was unreasonable or if their friend’s demands were unjustified, seeking clarity on the appropriate course of action.
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Remote Job’s Risks
A family disagreement has arisen over a potential summer job opportunity for their 16-year-old daughter. The wife, influenced by cultural norms from her country, has been insistent on finding their daughter employment, despite the husband’s reservations due to legal restrictions in their current country of residence.
An offer has come from the husband’s uncle, proposing that their daughter stay at his remote summer house on weekends to care for his dog, clean, and maintain the property in exchange for payment. While the wife sees this as a brilliant solution, the husband is hesitant due to the isolated location’s issues, such as frequent power and water outages, requiring walks through the woods to access a secondary cabin.
Adding to the husband’s concerns are the area’s poor reputation, with reports of thefts, trespassing, attempted burglaries, and even a kidnapping incident five years prior. The nearest essential services, like hospitals and shops, are also inconveniently far away for a teenager without personal transportation.
The family is divided, with the daughter and the wife’s parents favoring the opportunity, while the husband and their 11-year-old son, who relishes having the house to himself, are opposed. The wife, an avid Reddit user, seeks the community’s input in hopes of resolving the impasse.
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